Momma always said get a rich boyfriend, you don't gotta love him girl you can pretend

The more I become interested in woman's oppression in the States, the more I wonder how much I enable it myself.

I made the joke the other day that I'm a feminist until it comes to carrying something heavy or paying for my own meals.

Today I tried looking up where a man paying on a date originated from. Of course I assumed it somehow relates back to an exchange of services. And while I never found a phenomenal article on that particular subject, I did find this one.

I agree with the the 5 to keep.

I can stick up for myself, I can support myself, but a boy better open a door for me.

The 5 to ditch, I have mixed feelings on.

I will say when it comes to a man paying on dates, I never let a man pay in full on a date unless I am or intend to be exclusive with him.

I'll let him pay for dinner, but I'll buy dessert.

And once I am in a relationship, believe me when I say, its 50/50 

Furthermore, If I asked the guy on the date, you better know Im gonna pay.

As far as a man asking my father for permission.

 My feminist brain protests wildly against it as it was originally done as ,essentially, a purchase or exchange.

But my Disney princess brain thinks that's how its supposed to go.

And I'll tell you why.

Because the my father was the one who took care of me all these years, and now , my fantastic hardworking and wealthy boyfriend is asking my father if he trusts him to become the one to take care of me.

Good thing I was so lucky to have so many men to take care of me. I never could have done that on my own.

I can still see its appeal, aside from blatant tradition. Its making sure the father approves of the guy. I get it, I get it.

Speaking of my extremely wealthy boyfriend.

I preach about how woman are objectified, but, we do the same thing to men.

The other day a family member was trying to sell me on dating this guy.

He told me "He's funny, he's religious, hes a great guy, and he makes good money"

And I'll admit my ears perked up.

I cant tell you how many times I have never given a guy a chance because of his career aspirations.Or his height.Mostly just his height, cuz lets be real, I've dated a lot of actors. A lot of tall actors.

(you fish where you swim) 

So why does a guy pay on a date, even when he knows he aint getting any afterwards? Because he can. Look at all the things this man will pay for. 

I'll take my share of the blame in completely buying into that. But there is also a portion of the blame that can be attributed to a young girl being led to believe that is what she should strive for.

A man with money. Because someone in the marriage has to be making it, and , honey, it aint gonna be the woman.

 Yes its because she will be less educated. Yes its because she has low career aspirations. 

Yes, its because she will be home with the kids.

Because that is what shes expected to do. That's what she has been modeled to do. 

Obviously, this is not true for all woman, and I'm certainly not saying a woman who stays home with the kids is a waste of student loans. 

 Let me clearly stress that I do not think a stay at home mother is any less intelligent, driven,or hardworking than a Female CEO who built her company from the ground up.

All Im trying to say is:

why do you pay for the girl on a date?

why do you let the guy pay?

who taught your daughter she needed taking care of?